OTTAWA – Wealthy Canadians have begun a ‘Freegains convoy’ to Ottawa in their BMW X3s in protest of the government’s plan to raise the inclusion rate on annual capital gains in excess of $250,000.00 dollars.
“Not since the city of Toronto tried to build affordable housing in Rosedale has our community been so united in opposition,” said leader Harris Barnes Wentworth III, from his 2022 matte black X3, which comes with Bose speakers, individual climate control and a large LED display.
“Whether you’re a scion of family wealth or a humble plumber with millions of dollars in assets, we encourage all Canadians to join. As long as you have an X3. Range Rovers or Porsche 911s are fine too, but you have to drive at the back.”
The convoy is travelling all the way from the group’s summer homes in Lake Rosseau to Ottawa, a stunning display of solidarity, pride and the latest in luxury, precision driving technology.
The journey would ordinarily take only 5-6 hours, but the group is not expected to arrive for several days as they keep stopping every time they see a Starbucks.
“This is about everyday, dedicated Canadians who should not be forced to watch me pay more tax when I sell one of my investment condos,” said Kate Farnsbey-Lichtenstein, driving a 2021 model with the extended sunroof, upgraded security system and keyless entry.
Once they arrive in Ottawa the group intends to occupy the same downtown area the truckers did. They expect hundreds to be present, which will likely match the total of people who will actually be affected by the capital gains inclusion change.
Jesus Christ is King
Comments are closed.