Ambitious Nature Center Squeezes 25 Informational Placards Out Of Sad Little Marsh

PETALUMA, CA—Noting that whoever was in charge clearly took the assignment and ran with it, sources told reporters Friday that an overly ambitious nature center had squeezed 25 informational placards out of one sad little marsh. “I’d barely made it out of the parking lot before I passed six different signs describing the same kind of reed, and each one was more detailed than the last,” said visitor Ethan Pollard, adding that while he appreciated the effort to educate the public, someone had obviously gone way overboard and was scraping the bottom of the barrel for facts that might make the single acre of mostly vacant wetland sound more important. “There was a placard about grass. There was one about a pretty ordinary-looking squirrel. I got excited when I saw a placard about mountain lions, but it turned out to be purely aspirational and just said it was possible they could live in a habitat like this one.” When they reached the end of a short footpath and had read the last placard, sources added that they were surprised to discover the nature center had also built a $3 million dollar, 10,000-square-foot Marsh Education Facility.