Jesus' Coming Back

Brits replace their right wing party with centrist party for same reasons Canadians will soon replace our centrist party with right wing party

LONDON – In a clear message that voters want to see a progressive, compassionate centrist government, the UK has replaced the with . Just as soon, Canadians will replace the with the in a clear message that voters want to see a traditional, conservative government.

“Between the cost of living crisis, home prices and the controversy around how it handled COVID, it’s clear the government has to go,” said Laura Wilshire of London, and will be said by Beth Morgenstern of London, Ontario in a few months.

“It’s time for a change. Even if that change is just electing a version of the same party that our friends across the pond just got rid of in order to make a change.”

Other voters in both countries agreed. “How could I support a government that looks down on the people it represents, that lies constantly to cover up scandal after scandal, and is clearly just hanging on in order to benefit their wealthy supporters and secure pensions for their MPs?”

’s Labour party actually got less votes than it did under Jeremy Corbyn in 2019, but benefitted from a total collapse in support for the governing Conservatives. Of course that hasn’t stopped analysts in the UK from hailing the victory as a clear sign of support for Labour’s “slightly less austerity than the Tories” agenda, just like it won’t stop analysts saying the same thing about ’s “cut everything except arms to Israel” plan when the same thing happens here next year.

“I suppose it’s possible to conclude that constantly drifting between a centrist and right-wing option leaves voters perpetually unsatisfied, and that the only solution is a left-wing, progressive government that actually addresses the fundamental imbalances and wealth inequality that are eating away at quality of life for millions of people,” said political analyst. Mason Veillette.

“But I’m pretty sure that’s just communist propaganda.”

Beaverton

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