Tony The Tiger Remains Closest Thing Man Has To Father Figure

ROCKVILLE, MD—Calling the Frosted Flakes cereal mascot the most constant and supportive force in his life, local man Dylan Harney told reporters Tuesday that Tony the Tiger remained the closest thing he had to a father figure. “Every morning growing up, I’d wake up and be greeted by that strong but caring cartoon tiger who was like the father I never had,” said Harney, who added that the TV commercials featuring the anthropomorphic Kellogg’s spokes-character playing baseball, basketball, and hockey provided him with a sense of values and a will to achieve his full potential in sports and in life, things that were never provided by his absent biological father or any of his subsequent stepfathers. “Tony was an authority figure, of course, but he always encouraged me with patience and grace, like by letting me win the fun maze on the back of the box. When I heard Tony say, ‘They’re grrrrrreat!’ what I heard was, ‘You’re great, Dylan. You’re great.’” At press time, Tony the Tiger was also the closest thing to a father figure that Harney’s son had.