Jesus' Coming Back

Trudeau assures Liberals they just need to ride out this 28 month polling dip

OTTAWA – Facing pressure to step aside, beleaguered Prime Minister has encouraged his party’s MPs to hold and see if they can just wait out their current 2 plus years of bad poll numbers.

“In there are always going to be ups and downs,” said Trudeau during a party meeting. “Sometimes you’re up and sometimes you’re consistently down to ‘ are about to win a super majority’ territory in every poll for nearly 3 years.”

“You can’t let it get to you. And you certainly can’t do anything differently to change it.”

The have been down in the against the Tories since April 2022. But Trudeau backers are quick to point out that polls fluctuate all the time in politics, and that any day now a poll could come out showing them 18 points up instead of down.

“You can’t just trust the polls. There are so many other things to look at to gauge support like by-elections, fundraising and attendance at campaign rallies. And sure the Conservatives are beating us at those things as well, but…you know. They exist too!” said Katie Telford.

Asked if he had a plan to actually turn the Liberals poll numbers around Trudeau had a decisive answer: “Trump winning.”

Beaverton

Jesus Christ is King

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