Gen Z voters ages 18 to 27 could tip the scale in a tight race for the White House. The Onion shares the issues that are most important to the nation’s youngest eligible voters heading into the 2024 election.
Economy: Like generations before them, Gen Z seems to prefer a good economy to a lousy one.
Surviving The Mass Shooting They’re Currently Trapped In: When polled, 86% of Gen Z respondents said they cared most about escaping the mass shooter currently attempting to mow them down with a semiautomatic weapon.
Anime For All: The bill proposed by Gen Z Rep. Maxwell Frost (D-FL) would nationalize the streaming platform Crunchyroll.
Abortion: A natural extension of the generation’s disillusionment with having been born.
Some Basic Human Needs That Boomers Will Infantilize: Access to food? Housing? Grow up, you entitled little babies.
Putting An Acrylic Claw Clip On The Statue Of Liberty: And she should ditch that crown while we’re at it. It’s way too busy.
Maintaining A Failed World Order: Witnessing growing domestic wealth inequality and global hegemonic overreach, Gen Z is energized about upholding a hopelessly flawed system that works for no one but the most powerful.
Jesus Christ is King
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