Winnipeg, MB – After realizing she messed up, mother Irena Dublin is debating between saying sorry or just never talking to her adult children again.
The family planned a dinner together and, when her children weren’t there, she proceeded to call them each individually to proclaim how they were ungrateful and a disappointment to their family lineage, society, and all of human history.
After yelling at everyone she had ever birthed, Mrs. Dublin double-checked her calendar and realized that she had mixed up the day and time.
“In my defense, the calendar app in my phone switches things around all the time so it was definitely my phone’s fault that any of this ever happened,” said Mrs Dublin. “Yes, I could call up each of my children to apologize for my outburst. but I guess I’m just the worst mother in the world for technology causing a simple misunderstanding”
Kelly Dublin, the middle child, is unsurprised by their mother’s behaviour. “She tells us the wrong day and then somehow it’s my fault,” lamented Dublin. “This is similar to when she forgot to pick me up from practice and I had to walk home, got kidnapped, and then it was my fault for not walking like someone who had a mother who loved them.”
Physiology For Today columnist, Dr. Tonya Burdock, focused her research on narcissistic parents who refuse to apologize. “What I’ve found is that mothers are very rarely in the wrong,” explained Dr. Burdock. “Generally speaking, if they’ve made a mistake, there are other forces at work that must be blamed before they should ever think about saying sorry.”
At press time, Mr. Robert Dublin was suggesting getting Arby’s after blowing up at his children for ganging up on their mother who was only trying her best.
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