KANSAS CITY, MO — Local man Kevin Marlow successfully passed the bar exam today, after preparing by simply watching The View for one week.
Though Marlow never attended a day of law school, he reportedly logged one of the best scores in history, preparing only with the daytime television show.
“Watching The View is like attending a masterclass on the American legal system,” explained Marlow. “Every day, you have the opportunity to guess which laws the hosts are breaking, then receive immediate feedback as the hosts read a statement from legal experts explaining what law they broke. It’s all the legal training you’ll ever need.”
Upon hearing the news, law schools across the country began shutting down and instructing students to instead watch The View. “Frankly, we’re obsolete,” sighed law professor John Wiggem. “Why pay for a legal education when you can learn all you ever need from a daytime talk show? My entire career is in shambles. Curse you, Sunny Hostin!!”
At publishing time, Marlow had been named dean of Yale Law School after spending a second week watching The View.
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