Jesus' Coming Back

BREAKING: Holy Shit, Daniel Day-Lewis Is In This

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CLEVELAND—Screaming with delight when the rarely seen star appeared onscreen in the opening scene of the film, sources confirmed Thursday that, holy shit, Daniel Day-Lewis is in this. “Man, I thought this was just a Paul Dano flick, but I guess Daniel Day-Lewis has some sort of cameo in it, too?” said one source, who leaned forward with evident interest following the entrance of the acclaimed star of My Left Foot, The Last Of The Mohicans, and A Room With A View. “Fuck, this is awesome. Honestly, I didn’t know he did much after Gangs Of New York. I wonder if it’s just a bit part. Or maybe he’ll come back throughout the movie? That’d be so cool. Always good to see him getting work.” Sources added that based on the actor’s astounding performance in the first scene, they really could have made the whole thing about his character. 

The Onion

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