NASSAU, DE — After cuddling with her husband in front of a roaring fire and getting Christmas decorations put away over the weekend, local wife Jennifer Rushford realized she had nothing left to be stressed out about — and that stressed her out.
“This can’t be right,” she reportedly told her husband. “Everything is good, and that’s wrong.”
According to sources, the revelation hit her as she was reflecting on how she was at total peace. She took a sip of delicious hot cocoa and her eyes suddenly went wide with panic. Rushford would later explain how her heart started to beat faster the more she thought about how not-stressed-out she was.
“There must be something I’m forgetting,” she said. “Or worse, I’m not forgetting anything, which makes me psychotic and stressed for no reason. Which is also stressful.”
At publishing time, Jennifer’s husband expertly fixed the situation by helpfully reminding her to “calm down” and reassuring her that everything was fine.
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