Biden Confirms That Before Declaring New Amendment, He Talked To Respected Constitutional Scholars Beavis And Butt-Head
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a stunning declaration, President Biden has unilaterally added a new amendment to the Constitution, officially making the 28th Amendment, also known as the Equal Rights Amendment, the law of the land.
The President reassured critics by confirming he ran the decision by two world-renowned Constitutional scholars, Beavis and Butt-head.
“Beavis and his fellow expert Butt-head assured me I can do this,” said Biden in a press conference. “So it’s all perfectly legal. They would know. They told me they knew everything there was to know about the Constitution. So you all can rest easy knowing my decision passes the smell test.”
Biden then bent over to smell an intern who happened to be walking by.
Constitutional expert Beavis backed Biden’s claim. “We know everything about the Constitution. Like, it’s got… uh, amendments and stuff. That’s where they put the important crap, like, uh, the right to rock out and eat nachos. Yeah.”
Butt-head interjected. “No, dumb*ss, that’s the Bill of Rights. It’s, like, the rules for being awesome. The First Amendment is all, like, ‘You can have guns and blow stuff up and say whatever you want, even if it’s stupid, like you.’ Heh-heh.”
At publishing time, Biden had also declared a 29th Amendment to the constitution guaranteeing the right to “score hot chicks and stuff.”
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