Pioneering Female Archaeologist In Google Doodle Bears Silent Witness To Man’s Search For ‘Zootopia’ Porn
BALTIMORE—Mutely observing as the lewd query was entered into the prompt, a pioneering female archaeologist featured in a Google Doodle bore silent witness to local man Daniel Thornstein’s search for Zootopia porn, sources reported Friday. Harriet Boyd Hawes, an early 20th-century American archaeologist known for her groundbreaking work in Aegean antiquities, reportedly looked on wordlessly as Thornstein typed “judy hopps feet” and “judy hopps stinky feet” into the search bar below a digital illustration of a shovel and a dig site. Celebrated for her intellect, tenacity, and courage, Hawes, who is depicted in the doodle excavating Minoan artifacts on the island of Crete, remained stoic and unmoving when the phrase “chief bogo armpit fetish sweat” was employed to pull up both fan- and AI-generated pornography of animated Disney characters. At press time, the Google Doodle of the intrepid Professor Hawes reportedly maintained her unwavering stare as Thornstein scrolled through googled images of Nick Wilde, Finnick, and Yax triple-teaming Judy Hopps.
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