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Pastor Hoping Worship Goes Long Because To Be Honest He Doesn’t Really Have Much To Say About Philemon

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NASHUA, NH — Local pastor Matt Demitrio really hoped the worship team would go super long this morning as frankly, he just didn’t have much to say about the book of Philemon.

Pastor Demitrio silently cheered every added chorus and spontaneous interlude, hoping against hope for Brad the worship leader to launch into some impromptu anecdote.

“Come on, one more chorus,” whispered Demitrio. “Keep that piano humming, let’s get some ‘heart posturing’ going, Brad. Hit us with one of those mid-song stories that usually drive me nuts. Today is your day, buddy.”

Despite Pastor Demitrio’s best efforts, he could come up with no more than five minutes’ worth of sermon to preach about Paul’s ultra-brief epistle. “I’ve got to be honest, I just don’t have a lot to add here,” said Demitrio. “Maybe I’ll just have everyone read the whole book out loud in unison a couple times, kill another few minutes. I really need Brad to come through here.”

At publishing time, Pastor Demitrio had informed the church that the sermon would be wrapping a little early today to make time for a really, really extended time of silent reflection.


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