How Was I Supposed To Know ‘Business Casual’ Didn’t Include An Authentic 101st Airborne Paratrooper’s Uniform?
Is anyone else sick of all these confusing “dress code” terms that get thrown at us at seemingly every networking event, wedding, and social get-together? Like, does “resort casual” mean I can wear flip-flops? Does “semi-formal” mean tie or bow-tie? And how was I supposed to know that “business casual” doesn’t include a period-authentic World War II 101st Airborne M42 paratrooper’s uniform?
It’s irritating — and frankly, rather rude — when you organize a large industry convention and can’t be bothered to describe the expected level of dress beyond a vague term like “business casual.” What does that mean, exactly? A suit and tie? A polo shirt? Should I wear the chemically treated uniforms worn on D-Day, or would it be more socially acceptable to wear the wool jacket and trousers with their more commonly seen washed colors? Would a Thompson M1 accessory complement the uniform, or would people run away screaming, “He’s got a gun!” You can’t tell just from looking at the business event flyer, I’ll tell you that much.
Should I show up fully kitted out with my M1942 first aid pouch, my canteen, my M1943 entrenching tool? Would it be a faux pas to partake in the luncheon with my standard-issue US mess tin, or should I use the modern silverware? Should I greet other business networkers with my ACME cricket clicker, or should we dispense with that altogether and just go with the standard thunder/flash sign and countersign? It’s all so confusing and tiring, and not a single business event I’ve ever been to has even bothered to clarify all this stuff on their website or literature ahead of time.
They say “dress for the job you want,” and you do that just one time, and all of a sudden security is tackling you and yelling, “That guy has a grenade!”
So, here’s the stand I’m taking: let’s standardize these tyrannical and confusing “dress codes,” or let’s get rid of them altogether. Because just one person showing up to an event not realizing he’s not supposed to have dressed up like a B-17 crewman complete with M-3 flak helmet and crusher cap is one too many.
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