WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a beautiful display of solidarity with deported gang members, top Democrats had “MS-13” tattooed directly onto their foreheads.
Several members of Congress, including Senate minority leader Chuck Schumer, traveled to “Big Dave’s Ink” to have the logo of the notoriously violent gang emblazoned forever on their faces.
“We stand with Garcia. We stand with MS-13,” said Schumer, pointing to his forehead. “Let there be no doubt who we are fighting for. It’s literally tattooed on our faces. We are with you, gang people.”
According to sources, several democrats bearing the tattoos were subsequently roped into gang initiations. “It’s supposed to be a sign of solidarity, I’m not really a gang member,” said Senator Van Hollen to some young men on the street. “Yes, I see how having ‘MS-13’ tattooed on my forehead could be confusing. Well, fine. If shooting up this street corner and selling some crack is what it to takes to stand with MS-13, I’m in. Solidarity!”
At publishing time, Senator Van Hollen had officially been inducted into MS-13 in a beautiful ceremony that only killed seven people.
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