After PBS Defunded, All Sesame Street Characters Forced To Move In With Oscar
SESAME STREET — Following President Donald Trump’s executive order to strip federal funding from PBS, residents of Sesame Street were forced to pack their bags and move in with Oscar the Grouch just to survive.
Trump signed the order late Thursday directing the Corporation for Public Broadcasting (CPB) to end federal funding of PBS and NPR, leading to the mass layoff of hundreds of muppets, including those who live on Sesame Street.
“Elmo unemployed! HAHAHA! Elmo feels just like a grown-up! HAHAHA!” said Elmo as he moved into Oscar’s garbage can without asking. “Elmo’s house is in foreclosure! HAHAHA!”
Oscar the Grouch, a known recluse, was reportedly extra miserable now that every muppet in the neighborhood had moved into his trash can. “What gives?” he was heard asking as Ernie arrived to move in. “This dump ain’t big enough for all of you creeps!”
Big Bird, who had already been living on the street in a giant nest of his own design, reportedly moved in with Oscar because he was feeling left out. “Oh, dear! You guys are having a party? I like parties!” he said as he squeezed into the tiny garbage can. “I should tell Mr. Snuffleupagus to move in, too.”
At publishing time, local muppet Guy Smiley had also moved into Oscar’s trash can after being let go from his job as a reporter for NPR.
Babylon Bee subscriber Blender of Daves contributed to this report. If you want to pitch your own headline ideas to our staff, click here to check out all of our membership options!
The USA undeniably trumps our neighbors to the north.
Jesus Christ is King
