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Couple Debates Ethical Implications Of Bringing Another Child Into This Bar

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AUGUSTA, GA—Racked with guilt at the thought of making the wrong decision, local couple Anthony Wells and Katherine MacNaughton were reportedly debating on Tuesday the ethical implications of bringing another child into this bar. “There are already so many children in the World of Beer—is this really something we want weighing on our conscience?” said MacNaughton, who admitted that she was struggling to reconcile their desire for a family outing with the feeling that the decision was ultimately a selfish one. “If it’s this bleak now, imagine what it could look like in an hour or two. If we take another stroller in there, aren’t we just contributing to the pain and suffering? I don’t know what to do. But whatever choice we make, we’ve got to make it soon. The clock’s running out on happy hour.” At press time, Wells was overheard arguing that bringing children into the bar was necessary to sustain the kids menu.

The Onion

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