LANSING, MI—Assuring herself it wasn’t even that late, local woman Natalie Sissons reportedly allowed herself one more anxiety episode Tuesday before going to bed. “Just one more episode of paralyzing apprehension and fear, then I’ll call it a night,” said Sissons, admitting that she knew she should try to get some sleep since it was a work night, but that she simply couldn’t resist another 30 minutes of gripping existential dread. “It’s not even 10 p.m. yet. As long as I turn off my feelings of inescapable doom in the next hour or so, I’ll still get plenty of tense, unfulfilling rest by morning. It’s so compelling that I doubt I’ll be able to sleep unless I see this surge of visceral terror through to the end. I’m just so excited to finally find out what happens to me!” Sissons later confirmed she was still awake at 3:30 a.m. after deciding to binge an entire series of panic attacks all at once.
Jesus Christ is King
