pizza

TORONTO – Local jeweler Jason Jackson has eaten a bad Pizza Pizza pizza, according to cub cuisine columnist Ms. Chris Swiss. “I work all the time, and then I had to work overtime, so I just wanted to unwind with the pizza I designed,”…

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CHICAGO—Contemplating what he presumed was one of the most sought-after meals in all the city, local man Ron Steward told reporters Wednesday that a pizza slice at John’s Pizza & More had to be really delicious to be served from behind…

ST. LOUIS—In an effort to introduce a more satisfying version of their calcium tablets, Tums debuted a new deep-dish antacid pizza Friday that offers eight piping-hot slices of digestion aid. “Tums Antacid Deep-Dish Pizza features a…

SANTA CLARITA, CA—Immediately regretting every drunken decision that led him to this point, local man John Ewing recoiled in disgust Friday after the pizza he woke up to looked nothing like what he brought to bed last night. “Oh my God,…

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HOUSTON—Expressing overwhelming gratitude for his partner, local man Tyler Dorfman told reporters Monday that marrying his wife Kelsey Dorfman, a woman who doesn’t eat her pizza crusts, was the best decision he ever made. “It’s basically…

NEW YORK—In a move designed to make the curriculum more palatable to conservatives, the College Board announced Thursday that its revised AP African American Studies course would focus mostly on Herman Cain’s rise to CEO of a pizza…

Pizza Hut has broken the world record for the world’s largest pizza, making a nearly 14,000 square-foot New York-style pizza capable of serving 68,000 slices. What do you think?“Good luck finding thousands of people willing to eat Pizza…