time person of the year

“He needs to start putting what he tries on back onto the hangers. He brings an armful of, like, 30 crop tops over to try on, and it’s, like, first of all, we have a 15-item limit and you know that, but then he leaves them strewn all over…

Start SlideshowDecisions made in Maine and Colorado to strike Donald Trump from their respective state-level ballots using the Fourteenth Amendment’s insurrection clause have raised the question: Should the former president be disqualified…

WASHINGTON—Looking after the White House for a couple days while the president was out of town, Vice President Kamala Harris reportedly made a few extra bucks this week house-sitting for the Bidens. “As far as side gigs go, house-sitting is…

WASHINGTON—Using his platform to plead for Americans to lend him a hand, President Joe Biden addressed the nation Monday while hanging from a branch on the side of a cliff. “Our democracy has never before hung in the balance more than it…

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The Colorado Supreme Court banned President Donald Trump from appearing on the state’s Republican presidential primary ballot, citing the Constitution’s insurrection clause and Trump’s conduct during the Jan. 6, 2021 attack on the U.S.…

WASHINGTON—After first jamming a rake into the narrow, unfinished shaft in an attempt to dislodge the incumbent head of state, Secret Service agents spent an entire morning attempting to lure President Joe Biden out of a White House crawl…

LOS ANGELES—Following an indictment on nine federal tax-related charges, Hunter Biden reportedly prepared for court Friday by drawing a tie on his bare chest. “I’ll have to look presentable if I want the judge to take me seriously,” said…

WASHINGTON—Shining their flashlights to reveal the pajama-clad president with a wild look in his eye, the Secret Service reportedly found Joe Biden on the White House lawn Thursday attempting to dig his own grave. “It’s nearly four o’clock…

Start SlideshowAdvertisementPrevious SlideNext SlideThe Onion: “Thank you for meeting with us today.”The Onion: “Thank you for meeting with us today.”Henry Kissinger: “Of course! Can I offer you anything to drink? Sparkling water out of a…