Depending on who you ask there are many ways to say grace before a meal. You show us how you pray when gathered with others and we’ll tell you what that says about your theology.
So listen carefully next time during grace and that’ll be a dead giveaway as to what that person believes.
The prayer is for massively unhealthy fried chicken and casseroles to nurture our bodies – Baptist
Every other word is “thou”, “thy”, or “yeoldethinesteth” – KJV Baptist
Prayer is led by a woman – Hey, wait a minute, you’re not a Christian!
Prayer is about how terrible, awful, and undeserving we all are of the food we’re about to eat – Calvinist
No prayer – Unitarian
Makes strange hand gestures, might be praying or summoning an eldritch Lovecraftian horror – Catholic
Starts with Daddy God – Episcopalian
Start with Mother God – Episcopalian
Recites ancient prayer claimed to have been the exact words the Apostle Peter prayed over his fish tacos – Eastern Orthodox
Makes everyone hold hands – Your mom. DAAAAAANG!
Says cute little liturgical prayer between gulps of beer – Lutheran
By thanking the moon and sun god for this bountiful harvest – Wait a second! You’re a pagan!
Pray incantations in Latin – Catholics again
Pray incantations in Pig Latin – Joe Biden
Only Dad prays in this house – Presbyterian
Peek through your eyelids during prayer to see if the tide is back in and the surf is lookin’ gnarly – Calvary Chapel
Silent prayer over delicious oatmeal – Quaker
Prays in Hebrew and glances around to see if everyone noticed – Seminary student
No prayer just rolling around on the floor saying gibberish – Pentecostal
Well there you have it folks! That’s the definitive list of all the different ways to say grace.
The left, celebrities, and athletes will take money from China, but they sure don’t like talking about China. Tap your foot to the hit song parody of “We Don’t Talk About Bruno”!
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